The year of magical thinking AU. RusAme

Russia rested his head on the bed, kneeling on the ground and sobbing softly. He held his little girls hand, sobbing a bit harder now. Everything hurt for him seeing his only daughter being sick. He knew she would not make it to much longer, every breath she took in his shaky and unsteady, only hurting Russia more. He was a nation, his little girl was not. It didn't help that there was only so much morphing could help before it hurt. He looked at up her soft sweet little face. Silver hair and blue eyes... He smiled though his tears though, felling every breath, that could be her last, and every small pulse though her hand, not one 1/5 the size of his hand. He openly cried now, his eyes burning and heart braking. This was his and America daughter. The small little girl that was his and Americas/ He cried, her soft skin starting to turn a soft gray from the drugs. She was his little girl and gave anything to keep her happy and protect her in her short 5 year life. But he was powerless to this. He shook in sadness, but stoped when he heard the tiny little voice from the girl. "D..daddy?" She said, voice braking apart and her small body being dystored by the drugs. He tried to stop crying, but he could not. He sat up, putting a hand though her soft gray hair. "Shh...my Ana, I am here..." He said softly. The doctors had called Alfred, and he was going to be here any second. They also said that this could vary well be her last week. What could he do to help her? Nothing, the only thing he could do was let them give her more drugs so she didnt feel teh pain in her last weeks.

Alfred and Ivan had known that she was a sickly baby but didn't know it could get so bad. He was rarely ever in New York anymore, his country getting more and more corrupt from the mistakes his previous boss had made. He knew his new boss could make changes, but the stubborn house of Representatives wouldn't let him do shit. He wanted to be home with his family....but they both knew...that their people came first...or at least he knew. He love his daughter, she was perfect in every way, gorgeous. He was in DC, a board meeting when they had called him and said that this might be his daughter's last week and he could have burst into tears. He didn't even tell anyone he got up and left the meeting without a word. He took the first flight to New York. It was 2 long painful hours. He knew that Russia and his daughter were closer than America and her were. He was always home with her and America wasn't. But he loved her just the same and Russia did a damn good job taking care of her. The thought of losing her, he tried to compose his tears on the flight, but couldn't and many women went up to him and asked what was wrong of course he made something up to not make them worry, but really his heart was breaking. What if he didn't make it in time? What if he didn't get to see her alive again. Her smile, the way she giggled at things, and how her face lit up when he brought her home presents from his long trips. He couldn't think about it that way he would have to think positively. He dashed out the plane his eyes red and hailed the first cab and a woman was about to get on, he was desperate and paid her to let him have that cab, the desperation in his voice immense. He made it to the hospital and quickly told them to tell him where her room her, and once they knew his relation with her, he ran. He went to the room and opened the door to see Ivan kneeling over the bed holding their daughter's hand. He took slow steps and saw just how sick and miserable she looked, "Ivan." he called out, knew it was probably worse for him, and had to keep calm for the both of them. He tried so hard to fake a small smile.

Russia heard America but didn't turn away from his daughter. "D..Da?" He asked, not bothering to try and hid the horrible pain loged in his chest. He smiled and leaned up. Kissing her softly on the forehead. She giggled and looked at America. "daddy!" She smiled and grabbed for him, tugging him closer and in to a hug. She leaned back down after a long second and sighed, as if it hurt her to move, and it did. Russia looked at her, not sure how to say what the doctors did. He leaned down again, kneeling and still holding her hand. He smiled a broken smile, tears still rolling down his face. "Daddy? Are you ok?" He smiled and nodded. "Da" It killed him to say that. "D...Da....everything will be fine" He sighed in pain squeezing her hand tightly. He looked up at America, mothing the words. "Do not tell her" She was as think skulled as her dad and didn't have a clue yet. If she had a week. he would sit here untill the doctors dragged him out, if she was here for another year? He would sit there until he was forced out. He brought America down with him, sitting and holding his hand with his free one. "Ana, you will be fine, my sunflower" He smiled again, still sobbing and looking at her graying skin. "We love you, so so much" He said, still having tears streaming dwon hsi face.

America bit his lower lip, seeing Russia like this, so heartbroken and depressed, hurt, because as the hero, he was helpless to find a cure or anything. He saw her grab for him and he put on his own smile, it was fake and it felt like his jaw was being ripped open, but he pulled through. He hugged back, watching his strength around her and saw how much weight she lost, she was almost bones. He said, "Hey kiddo!" and set he down gently, America was known for his false promises, especially when it came to making people feel better. His eyes were still red and flashed a smile to Russia a lump growing in his throat, "Yeah, don't worry, ya know your dad is strong, so he's gonna be alright." trying to lighten up the room a bit. God how he wanted to make Russia stop crying, he wanted to hold him and run his hand through his head whispering and promising that it will be okay. America continued to smile at her and said, "And once you're okay we're gonna go to the amusement park and the zoo and all that other stuff, I'm not gonna go back to DC so we can all have fun together." he false promises broke his own heart, because he knew they would most likely never happen. He put a hand on Russia's shoulder and squeezed it a bit, he didn't want the last scenery of her life to see both of her parents crying over her. He really didn't.

Russia smiled at her. "Da, I can take you to Russia, and show you the plays and the citys" He smiled and kissed for forhead again. "Go to sleep, my sunflower" He said sfotly. She smiled up at her dad and did as she was told, and fall asleep. Russia smiled slithly and got up, turing to America and falling in to his arms, sobbing as quitly as he could. "W...Why her..." He said, crying and not hading it, holding on to Americas tight as he could and felling a tare in his chest. Not able to feel his heart out of the pure horror of what was happing. He sobbed, stil lcarful not to wake her up. "God, my only dauther..." He said softly, shaking a bit and still not having gotten his idea of what was going on. He looked at america, slumping down a bit. "S..She is..our..child and we can not do anything.." He said, mianly to himslef. He looked back at her. "One week and I can do nothing but say goodbye!" He sobbed, begging for it to stop, for her, for him, and America

America smiled at her and said, "Night kiddo, get some sleep." and the other's slumped into his arms and held him up bringing him close to his chest and rubbing his back up and down soothingly and bit his lower lip to keep himself from letting out sobs and crying and said,"I'd take her place if I could." but he couldn't, neither of them could, they were both nations, and America knew that she would die...but he never knew or expected it to be this soon. He shook his head and said,"I don't know, I don't know." it broke his heart to see Russia like this. He went back to when he first told Russia, the other looked so happy and America was so scared, but Russia helped America, and this child, their child was the light of his life. But now, she was being taken away. America's seen a lot of people die, but this was the one with the most impact on him. He continuned to hold on to Ivan and let him cry try to calm down a bit, but nothin he could say to make this better, they both new the facts, they both knew what was going to happen, so it was too late for America to make some bullshit lie to make it all better. America a few of his own tears slip out and held on tighter to Ivan. Those 5 years, were probably the busiest but best years of his personal life. He was running all over the place but when he came home exhuasted and just wanted to knock out, he saw their faces and couldn't bring himself to go to sleep. He sniffled aa bit and said to Ivan the lump in is throat hurting to try and restrain the sobs that wanted to escape, "It's gonna be okay.....she's a strong kid, she's gonna pull through." but America couldn't help himself, it was in his nature to say anything to calm the people down.

russia knew it was all lies america was saying. They were all wothless lies that no matter how hard he tried he could never get to become a realtiy. He tried to stop crying. He told himslef he would stop crying. that was another lie. But he wanted so so bad for it to be true, it almsot hurt to want. He KNEW that she would die, and he KNEW that he did not want her too, but he didnt want to belve tht it was all true. He kept slunched in to Americas arms. Holding him tightly and eveutaly stoping tears from rolling down his face. He looked at America. "I love you.." for lieing to me; It did help though, somehow, he knew that even hearing it made him feel better, despite the traing feeling in his chest.